I took this while we were at the Royal Gorge. There was also a November 26 birthday key chain, but I couldn't find it when I went to take a picture :(
I took this while we were at the Royal Gorge. There was also a November 26 birthday key chain, but I couldn't find it when I went to take a picture :( I'm still in Colorado and got to meet up with another mommy who carried to term. Her angel had Triploidy and was born in February. It was so nice to talk to someone who has been in those low places that I've been. I felt like I didn't have to hold back when talking to her...and to be talking to her face-to-face!!! It was just amazing! We went on a hike and she made curry chicken salad to take with us for lunch (shoot, I forgot to snag that recipe!). I have a few more name gallery pictures to post and one of them are from a hike Megan and her husband made awhile ago where she wrote names of angels on these beautiful, smooth rocks and took pictures of them in/near this little waterfall (close to where her and I hiked). As a mother who has lost a child, she understands how wonderful it is to have your child remembered and to see their name. We had 2 more angel rocks to take pictures of and a "Happy Birthday, angel" rock for the creator of our "Carrying to Term" group on Babycenter. So it was nice to be a part of such an amazing thing that she had done (and continues to do). When we got back to her house, we lost track of time and chatted too long...LOL...so I got to meet her sweet husband also! It was such a great day for me and I hope it was for her, too. As today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness, I do have to bring up a negative aspect in this blog. I feel like I've overcome most the bitterness and anger (not all, I will admit) but there are things that will never sit well with me. I do realize that the people who say dumb things probably won't read this blog (if they did, they would care enough about me to think about things before they say them...). Talking about death and/or babies is completely fine with me. They are facts of life that are real and I don't see anything wrong with talking about them. BUT if you have a very strong opinion about those 2 subjects together...DO NOT speak to me about it. You can tell anyone else about your opinions, but not to a grieving mother...and just for the record - I will forever grieve the loss of my son. I don't expect anyone who's never been through it to understand. Not only is that irrational, but impossible. You only ever THINK you can TRY to imagine, but it's 100 times worse than your worst nightmare...I promise. I'd never wish what I've been through on my worst enemy, but I wish I could bottle the "after" feeling and let people open it once in awhile to catch a glimpse of the pain I go through on a daily basis. It's not near as intense as it used to be, but it's still there and I still feel a sharp jab whenever I hear Tyler's name or hear an ignorant comment. If you're reading this and you care for me IN THE LEAST, please be gentle on my heart and think about the subject you're discussing with me. I'm not saying you can't speak to me about Tyler, quite the opposite....ASK me about him. I want to tell you about him and I need to talk about him, but I'm not the one to preach to about your moral or ethical opinions because, quite frankly, I don't care. If you accomplish nothing more than to upset me, does that make you feel powerful? That you made sure your opinion was heard? To those that have been here for me, read every blog, let me cry on your shoulder, didn't judge me when I got upset when holding your baby or just let me talk for hours about my pregnancy and Tyler: Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You will never know how much you helped in my healing.
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How awesome that you got to spend time with another BLM! You are right, only other BLM's know the pain of losing a baby. Even then we all deal with it differently. None of us are wrong, just different. I think about you and pray for you constantly! Hugs and many prayers! xoxo
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Brittany ClarkI'm blogging in hopes of reaching out to other parents who have to face the most heartbreaking experience in life. Archives
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