Yesterday was 7 months. You know who remembered? Nobody. Not a single person said a word to me about Tyler yesterday. I actually had fewer visitors to this site yesterday than the entire month of June. I NEVER expected everyone (or anyone) to remember every month or even his birthday, but the reality hit yesterday. This is when my pain is only my own, it can't be shared. Unlike the past few angelversaries, there were lots of tears yesterday. Lots of triggers to remind me that my life isn't roses and I'm not the naive person I once was. I wish I could be, yet so thankful I'm not. And knowing that everything happens for a reason and that there's a higher power at work, doesn't make the hurt any less. I ache so badly, physically, when I look at pictures of Tyler. "One more" will never be enough, but I can't help but wish for one more kiss, one more touch of his soft skin, one more chance to tell him how much I love him and how badly I miss him. I know that this life is a blink in comparison to eternal salvation, but it feels too damn long to me.
I'm blogging in hopes of reaching out to other parents who have to face the most heartbreaking experience in life.